i came into this world covered in someone else’s blood and screaming and lemme tell you i’m not afraid to leave it the same way
(Source: drarna, via lady-seitan)
i came into this world covered in someone else’s blood and screaming and lemme tell you i’m not afraid to leave it the same way
(Source: drarna, via lady-seitan)
A dark night—the streets belong to the cats.
The cats and whatever small thing they find to kill—
The cats are fast like their ancestors in the hills
and hungry like their ancestors.
Hardly any moon. So the night’s cool—
no moon to heat it up. Summer’s on the way out
but for now there’s still plenty to hunt
though the mice are quiet, watchful like the cats.
Smell the air—a still night, a night for love.
And every once in a while a scream
rising from the street below
where the cat’s digging his teeth into the rat’s leg.
Once the rat screams, it’s dead. That scream is like a map:
it tells the cat where to find the throat. After that,
the scream’s coming from a corpse.
You’re lucky to be in love on nights like this,
still warm enough to lie naked on top of the sheets,
sweating, because it’s hard work, this love, no matter what anyone says.
The dead rats lie in the street, where the cat drops them.
Be glad you’re not on the street now,
before the street cleaners come to sweep them away. When the sun rises,
it won’t be disappointed with the world it finds,
the streets will be clean for the new day and the night that follows.
Just be glad you were in bed,
where the cries of love drown out the screams of the corpses.
mvcr:
I had my first root canal today, at last. It really wasn’t terrible. At times, it was downright relaxing. I like having attention paid me. The worst part, the only part that was painful was when they stuck me with the needles to inject the novacaine. Before he did it, he said I was going to feel a stick, and the girl put her hand on my shoulder. That’s how I knew it was going to hurt. Because of her hand, not because of him telling me outright. She put her hand… On my shoulder. Some woman I don’t know. It was such an ineffective move. What could her hand on my shoulder do to keep the needle from hurting another area. Or any area. I didn’t mind, it was comforting, and now it kind of breaks my heart the way everything does. There was no question about whether or not it was comforting, I just don’t know why. I talked about this already, when Ronin held me in the grocery store. I’m not in any pain like that now. I’ve been feeling better. I used to see things that made someone look vulnerable, usually involving enjoyment. Mild enjoyment. Not orgasms or when a child flies out of a chute into a pool at a water park. Not ecstasy. Just someone eating a piece of pizza at the food court in the mall. Like that. Someone doing something that’s just like, “Hmmmm…” Not like, “Merp.” Most things people do are just like, “Merp.” Like driving and looking at their phones and standing in front of an ATM and reading the ingredients on the back of a box of cookies. Not mindlessness. I hate that, and I feel disdainful at everyone merping around. But when someone is having a vulnerable public moment of enjoyment, my heart breaks. Not out of sadness. Out of love. See the difference. I like to look at people sleeping and look at their anuses. Not when they’re sleeping, necessarily. I think you can see more looking into someone’s anus than into one or more of their eyes. I am not joking. People can lie with their eyes. The butthole never lies. I’d like to see a little thing die of old age and know that’s what was happening. I think about bumble bees dying in midair. That sentence was supposed to be about bumble bees, but I think it turned up to be more about me and who I am. That was not my intention. I like to talk a lot about pitiful things I love, and how much I hate myself. Last night a short guy came up to Kittie and me at the bar and he asked us a series of asinine questions, and told us he wasn’t attracted to us, we were just the only girls in the bar. I was really glad he kept coming over to pester us, not because I enjoyed being approached by him, it was just nice to see someone try to see how far he could get before being denied the fuck. He was a little wanker. I told him Ronin was my dioux, and I don’t think he believed me. Ronin walks around the place with the face of one of those stones at Easter Island. You know what I’m talking about. It’s just like that. Owls are a big thrill. I’d like to see a big scary barn owl with a punched little face and narrowed eyes looking like a flying demon. I like to see a big bird. I hate myself. I like to talk like someone whose first language is not American English. Or like a kid who hasn’t grown into their oversized ears. I really love big sticky-outty ears. I wish I had someone to talk to, kind of. Hahaha. I just got a text that said, “Ignore me.”
Nobody seems to age quietly anymore. There are so many drugs in me at any given time my doctor is like Spread them all out, so I stretch my body across E’s California King while she lights a joint—some government shit she bought off a boy she never thought to meet before today. Her bedroom is all bed and record player. Her records are stacked higher than most girls I’ve kissed or even thought about kissing. I can’t remember the last time I wore a hat. The last time I wore socks I was engaged and that was bad. Breathing is easier when E uses her mouth as a shotgun. I can’t fuck the first one out of me, the one from when I was barely alive—years before Z—years before a bunch of girls who looked like Z, but I can smoke her out. I do: She leaves the knots in my shoulders, the parts of my cock she always touched the most. I get E off three times even though we stay mostly clothed. After, she isn’t even on my fingers. I never think about the gravity of a whisper. I don’t remember what happens after the second blunt, but in the morning E promises I didn’t say anything dumb. I take a piece of gum and nod. I sneak out the back door even though she’s not married or even touching anyone else.
Look at me, so worried about the fireflies we caught last night
in a mason jar. I wrote that sentence wrong & now
all of last night is caught in a mason jar. It’s cool though,
I punctured extra holes in the lid. Now, we all breathe
like leftover redwoods. Is California still on fire?
Was it ever? I am convinced it is bad to live
forever, so I’m going as a poet for Halloween. I’m broke as fuck.
I’m selling this poem to a car commercial.
& as the Lexus rounds the bend in say New Hampshire,
in say the parts of Memphis that weren’t pregnant last week,
in say my coffee swirling tornadoes whistling heavy
train tracks, the narrator will say Sometimes giants
only smell like giants. The couple in the Lexus smile
like old mistletoe.Their blood feels lazy. Sometimes it only
takes a stone to kill a giant. Matte pages are never for lease,
but the strings holding up tomorrow are.
The way today has stretched me out, how do I still have eyes?
I am sick of trying to buy things with contributor copies.
I was always born old.
Every bridge I build goes straight up.
Because I live in south Florida I store cans of black beans and gallons
of water in my closet in preparation for hurricane season.
I throw a hurricane party in January. You’re my only guest.
We play Marco Polo in bed. The sheets are wet like the roof caved in.
There’s a million of me in you. You try to count me as I taste the sweat
on the back of your neck. I call you Sexy Sexy, and we do everything twice.
After, still sweating, we drink Crystal Light out of plastic water bottles.
We discuss the pros and cons of vasectomies. It’s not invasive you say.
I wrap the bedsheet around my waist. Minor surgery you say.
You slur the word surgery, like it’s a garnish on a dish you just prepared.
I eat your hair until you agree to no longer talk about vasectomies.
We agree to have children someday, and that they will be beautiful even if they’re not.
As I watch your eyes grow heavy like soggy clothes, I tell you When I grow up
I’m going to be a famous writer. When I’m famous I’ll sign autographs
on Etch-A-Sketches. I’ll write poems about writing other poems,
so other poets will get me. You open your eyes long enough to tell me
that when you grow up, you’re going to be a steamboat operator.
Your pores can never be too clean you say.
I say I like your pores just fine. I say Your pores are tops.
I kiss you with my whole mouth, and you fall asleep next to my molars.
In the morning, we eat french toast with powdered sugar. I wear the sugar
like a mustache. You wear earmuffs and pretend we’re in a silent movie.
I mouth Olive juice, but I really do love you.
This is an awesome hurricane party you say, but it comes out as a yell
because you can’t gauge your own volume with the earmuffs on.
You yell I want to make something cute with you.
I say Let me kiss the insides of your arms.
You have no idea what I just said, but you like the way I smile.
(via syndrome)
(Source: 8yrs, via sunflowersutraaa)
J.W.N. Sullivan, Beethoven: His Spiritual Development.
when i was five years old i saw an insect that had been eaten by ants and of which nothing remained except the shell. through the holes in its anatomy one could see the sky. every time i wish to attain purity I look at the sky through flesh. - Salvador Dali
(Source: creepychick)
Your next-door neighbor was always crying. One afternoon she stood in the grass cutting her hair, which vanished as it fell into the thick of green things. In case you’re wondering, I have a web cam. People pay me to have sex and then cry. She brewed herbal tea with leaves from her garden,mint so sharp it brought tears to your eyes.
(Source: poemeleon.org, via bunnycorcoran)
“and when the event, the big change in your life, is simply an insight— isn’t that a strange thing? that absolutely nothing changes except that you see things differently and you’re less fearful and less anxious and generally stronger as a result: isn’t it amazing that a completely invisible thing in your head can feel realer than anything you’ve experienced before?”
― j. franzen
(Source: playaplz)
Chinese poet Li Po (701-762) is regarded as one of the two greatest poets in China’s literary history. He was well known for his love of liquor and often spouted his greatest poems while drunk.
One night, Li Po fell from his boat and drowned in the Yangtze River while trying to embrace the reflection of the moon in the water.
(via terramantra)
Photos from Police Journal Magazine.
A depressed man took his own life by taking a long length of chain, locking it to a large tree and returning to his car with the chain tied tightly round his neck. He reversed the car as far back as possible until the chain was tight. He then stamped on the accelerator and the photo tells the rest of the story.
Another motorist discovered the body and vehicle the next day.
(via nikkihattaway)